LONELINESS, A NECESSARY PART OF YOUR PATH
Pamela Kribbe channels Jeshua
I am Jeshua, I greet you all from my heart. Feel the light that is present here, it is flowing from your hearts. I embrace your light within myself and then reflect it back to you, so that you may know, feel, and remember who you are: a lightworker, a carrier of light. It is your highest purpose, your inspiration, to manifest all the light from your heart and your soul here on Earth. Feel that desire inside you, in all the cells of your body. You are here to let your light shine, unencumbered, without shame or guilt. Do that now, open all the cells of your body and feel the light within – let it radiate! Let it well up from deep within your abdomen, through your heart, your throat, your eyes. The light almost bursts out, because it wants to do that; it is the nature of light to shine like a sun.
You have withheld your light long enough and it is now time to move past the inhibitions, the holding back, the resistance. What a relief that you are allowed to do that and can do that, because it takes a lot of force to withhold the light that wants to naturally shine from within yourself. Hiding your light takes considerable effort and creates a lot of stress, and doing that makes you ill and depressed, bitter and disappointed. You are here on Earth to attend to the call of your soul, and doing that is what will make you free and happy. So why does that seem so hard to do? Because you are struggling against your light, even as you are sitting here. You are afraid of it and that fear creates the resistance, the hiding, the adjusting to what you think is proper and right. It creates the defensive walls you have built within yourselves.
Feel now that the soul inside you is stronger than ever. Your soul wants to be born on Earth, here and now. Feel the burning desire in your soul, and the joy and gladness that go with that. The fire in you does not know any self-doubt, it is full of passion; it ignites and inspires, so allow it in. Let the fire, the light of your soul, flow through you. Feel the light gather around you and receive your soul in your body. Breathe in who you are. You do not owe anyone a justification or explanation for being who you are: “This is who I am, this is my essence, my being.”
Every one of you, in the course of your life, has had your belief structure shaken. The belief, “I am That; I am” felt with no doubt, was damaged in you all. In some cases, this happened before you started your current life. There might have been past lives in which wounds were inflicted, both mental and physical wounds, that affected you and obscured your ability to see who you are, and your original light. It might also be that you remembered your own light when you were born in this current life, but you were unable to maintain that memory. You were influenced by your environment, which was ruled by fear, anger, insecurity, and doubt. You all know the feeling of having lost your inner path, and you then look for the light outside yourself.
This is the fate of virtually every child, because in the beginning of life on Earth, you are vulnerable. As a baby, you are physically, as well as emotionally, vulnerable, so you instinctively reach out to, and rely on, the input from your environment and you do this in more than one way. A part of you craves the warmth of love, as a warm blanket around you: that reassurance and security for which every earthly child longs. But there can also be a deep fear present within you when you again incarnate on Earth, especially if you are burdened with wounds and scars from previous lives, which is why you have a strong need for being cherished and reassured in your early childhood. You reach out to the people around you with the hope of receiving light and strength from them.
There is another way that you reach out to the people around you, which is not about wanting to receive, but about wanting to give. You who are present here are all sensitive souls. There is a depth in your heart and spirit, and even as a small child or a baby you were subtly perceptive of the world and people around you. While your physical brain was not yet fully developed, your senses were. Your heart was open and you perceived pain in your mother and father, and negative energy in your environment. Somewhere, from a memory of your soul’s purpose, you wanted to help heal and make things right for them, and to bring harmony into their lives. You wanted to help your parents by bringing light to them. You were still so close to that other dimension, from where you and your soul came, that you felt that impulse very strongly.
Both in the yearning for nurturance and confirmation, and in the deep impulse to want to heal, to bring awareness, to want to give, you can get attached to the world around you in a way that can become, and has become, very painful. For on this Earth, you can lose yourself in giving and wanting to heal the world around you, just as you can lose yourself in the desire for care and light from outside yourself. What happens in that early loss of self is that you do not yet fully realize who you are and in what way you stand out from the world around you. It is in the half conscious wanting to give and receive that you get confused about yourself and who you are, because you then become dependent on the world around you. You start to relate the giving with the receiving. You hope that if you share selflessly with others, sympathize and empathize with others, sooth and heal them, that you will receive back the reassurance and the security for which you so yearn, and the recognition of the light that you really are when in a world that feels strange to you,.
Sooner or later, you experience and discover that this approach to life leads you astray. And this discovery is painful, because you partially fulfill your soul’s mission by sharing your light, by wanting to transform negative energy into harmony. Nevertheless, becoming an actual, self-aware lightworker asks that you take a step back from this wholly, or half, conscious dynamic of giving and receiving, from the desire for light and strength from outside yourself. You have to free yourself from this need in order to really start to shine from your own essence, from your own depth. All forms of dependence on the world outside yourself eventually leads you away from your soul. And so your path first leads you to accepting your aloneness, to your being an “I” before you can connect with the world and people around you from independent strength and love. As an adult, as soon as you walk a spiritual path, you are challenged to face the ancient fears of the child within yourself, who was looking for security outside itself, and for you to give your inner child what it needs. And that is a big step you are asked to take.
Many of you lightworkers wonder why you so often feel lonely and misunderstood by the people around you, whether by your birth family, or later by people at school and at work. “Why is this feeling of being different, of alienation, happening to me?” And I am telling you that part of your path, your soul’s path, is to go through a deep stretch of loneliness. Only by experiencing that loneliness can, and will, you discover that you yourself are meant to ignite the flame, the light, within yourself. Being alone is like a tunnel you go through – that you have to go through – in order to really become independent of the world. The expression goes: be in the world, but not of the world. To “be of the world” means that you are influenced by demands from outside yourself, such as to be acknowledged and accepted or not, or to be successful or not. This “being of the world” leads you away from your soul.
Therefore, I am asking you to now take a moment to completely take care of yourself. Imagine that you are shining the light I talked about earlier, the light that so badly wants to shine freely and unencumbered on to your deepest fear and your need for security and reassurance. Embrace that need completely by enveloping it with the warmth of your soul and your heart. Take the child within you onto your lap or into your heart. Feel in this child the wounds and scars of pain, of loss, of fear, but also feel your great light and how this is able to fill up the child completely – to fulfill it.
This child has waited so long for you. When you nurture the child within you with your light – here on the Earth – you heal old traumas from the past and create independence. And while you are doing this, feel the supportive, powerful energy of Mother Earth under your feet. She wants to receive you, you are welcome here on the Earth. Let the light flow through you and connect you with the Earth while you cherish the inner child deep within yourself by giving it what it needs. Let your light flow through your feet and feel how Mother Earth welcomes you, here and now.
© Pamela Kribbe
Translation by Maria Baes and Frank Tehan